What are the Coonies you ask?

THE MAMMY A SYMBOL OF THE COONIE AWARD

You are probably wondering what The Acconemy Awards are? At least you should if you are looking at this web page. The Acoonemy Awards are the awards given to the men and women that have acted a fool (Mel Gibson) or showed their ass (M. Fishburne) in 2010. Usually the term "coon" is reserved for slow, dumb African - Americans but no longer. Thanks to this awards presentation, a coon can be a male, a female, a black, white or Latina. Whatever. Any race. Any person. So, check out the nominees and make your voice heard and vote for your choice for Coon Of The Year and all the other coon categories. You have plenty of options to choose from.

Coon Of The Year..And the nominees are...

Glenn Beck

A carnival barker that with a microphone.

Sarah Palin

She is more than qualified for this nomination. Probably the only time that will ever be written about her.

Tiger Woods

A 100 million dollar settlement with his wife after a stint in sex rehab, that press conference that looked like a cold open to Saturday Night Live sketch and the total eradication of his Golf Game! At least with this nomination Tiger is could win something this year.

Charlie Sheen

Somewhere Charlie Sheen is holding onto Emilio Estevez asking him, "am I a Good Father?"

T.I.

Clifford Harris A.K.A. T.I. might have had the worst year ever! Unexplainably tapped as an "it" boy by the power brokers from Hollywood, T.I couldn't wait more than a minute before he went back to jail by violating his parole with drugs in his system. Codeine and weed no less, A coon combination. T.I.'s mistake was so stupid that even the most militant militant wouldn't defend him. To make matters worse, he saved someone from an apparent suicide that coincidentally took place right before his parole hearing. Reports say that T.I. was crying when he was sentenced to 11 more months in the bing.

Mel Gibson

Just when you thought Mel Gibson being an unrepentant Anti - Semite was the worst thing that he could be known for, turns out we were wrong. He also happens to be a wife beater, someone that leaves threatening voicemails and a bit of a racist. Even Tiger Woods thought his voicemails were irresponsible.

Male Coon Of The Year... and the nominees are...

Ben Roethlisberger

Big Ben was so blatant in his misogyny that even the color of his skin couldn't save him. Come on Ben didn't your dad teach you not to treat women like an NFL Defensive Line? You can't run right through them!

Jesse James

Dude? Only the coonery of tattoo, motorbike and Nazi enthusiast Jesse James could make a year in which his ex - wife Sandra Bullock won an Academy Award her worst year ever!

Charlie Sheen

Kanye West

Mr. Amber Rose released a movie that was worse than Battlefield Earth?

Alvin Greene

Someone white, evil and who has direct links to the birth of The Klan was responsible for the creation of this man! In an earlier time, Alvin Green wouldn't even have been qualified to be a slave, let alone a Senator. But today, he is more than well - qualified to be a nominee for Male Coon of the Year.

Antoine Dodson

Seriously, isn't his picture in the dictionary under the word coon? If Antoine Dodson didn't exist a racist cartoonist would have created him!

Female Coon Of The Year... And the nominees are

Montana Fishburne

Hands down the front - runner for this award. A porn tape - not a sex tape but a full fledged porn movie was made by this daughter of Black Hollywood royalty. Morpheus' daughter showed her ass in 2010. Literally. And it had pimples all over it. How screwed up does one have to be to make Kat Stacks seem regular?

Christine O'Donnell

Not a witch but most definitely a coon.

Fantasia

Seriously? A homewrecker? An illiterate? An easy hook up? Is she trying to be a superstar singer or the world's most famous chicken - head? We want to root for you but you keep telling us not to.

Ginny Thomas

Talk about opening up a can of 18 year old worms? I amost forgot about the trophy wife of the most powerful Judicial sell - out in American History until she went and left a Mel Gibson-ish voicemail on Anita Hill's answering machine. And to make matters worse she is a member of the tea party. Clarence do us a favor and pretend to be a strong black man for once in your life.

Lindsey Lohan

Do you know what you get when you add a chronic cocaine problem with experimentation in lesbianism, the selection of bad scripts and a love of going out and getting wasted? A wasted career and a nomination for the Acoonemy Awards.

Kat Stacks

If there was ever a whore tailor - made for the Digital era it would be Kat Stacks. She screwed more rappers than record executives. I am seriously surprised that she is still alive.

Rapper Coon Of The Year...And the nominees are...

Souljaboytellem

Dude I don't care young you are Dre, you old enough to know better than screwign Kat Stacks.

Kanye West

Lil Wayne

He made more than the warden the nine months he was in jail.

Antoine Dodson

Waka Flocka

Sports Coon Of The Year... And the nominees are...

Tiger Woods

Ben Roethlisberger

Lebron James

The Worst Decision he made was The Decision.

Brett Farve

Phone Cockshots. Fake Retirements. Wrangler commercials! And those were the positive things that happened for him in 2010.

Gilbert Arenas

This guy is so screwed up his therapist needs a therapist.

Reggie Bush

A bad year for Reggie. He lost everything. His Heisman, his girlfriend and his season due to injury. Well everything that is except his dignity. He lost that when he first started dating Kim Kardashian.

Political Coon Of The Year... And the nominees are...

Charles Rangel

Quite frankly he's nominated for not not being guilty enough. After 40 years in office and Rangel couldn't even steal enough to afford a lawyer? Next time Chuck if you are going to half - way steal, do it right. Go all the way.

Jimmy McMillan

Saying the rent is too damn high is one thing, but having mutton chops, a coon dress code and a wardrobe out of welfare Old Navy is just coonish to the tenth degree. The Rent may be too damn high but Jimmy, you are too damn much of a coon. And repeat.

Carl Paladino

This guy had a good chance to become Governor of New York until he opened his mouth. Hating on Gays and threatening reporters isn't a good way to win a campaign. Great way to become a Fox News analyst but not Governor. He was so coonish that even the New York Post didn't endorse him.

Juan Williams

When you have a Puerto Rican fist name and a Black last name it's easy to see why you would get confused about your opinions. But Juan Williams feeling uncomfortable around Arabs in an airport? But relaxed when sitting next to Bill O'Reilly or William Kristol? Who would have ever thought that the guy that wrote Eyes On The Prize would be nominated for an Acoonemy Award?

The Tea Party

They are the 21 century of The Klan. Period!